SIMPLY MPOWERING®

I would like to share with you a bit more about the magic of healthy boundaries. 

You might wonder how healthy boundaries can have anything to do with magic? 

Let me elaborate here a little. Many things in my life changed for the better once I had clear boundaries in place. 

When you are able to say "no" to a situation or a person, it will open up a space where you can create more magic for yourself and ultimately others.

I have to admit though that it was at times a turbulent journey to learn how to set healthy boundaries. 

Let me briefly share an example.

The short version: After my dog and I had been attacked for the third time by the same dog and I had ended up with a torn jacket and bite marks on my arm I really had enough. 

I was so angry that I filed a police report, which for me was a very big step to take. My anger was not irrational or abusive. My anger was a very clear emotion that was saying: "Enough of allowing others to harm me...

I would like to share with you a bit more about the magic of one small step.  

Life never ceases to surprise me. Sometimes those surprises bring a lot of challenges and other times they are magical. 

Some challenges can lead to magic further down the road. 

What do I do when I come across challenging situations in my life?

I like to keep it simple. One of my favourite resources is a very simple but powerful question that is rooted in Gestalt Therapy: "What is the smallest possible step that I can take now?" 

As crazy as it might sound but more or less immediately, almost magically, the energy changes and possibilities open up or ideas appear.

It is a matter of first of all accepting that I am somehow stuck and maybe even feel overwhelmed with a situation. This is a very crucial step especially on any healing journey or when you are going through challenges.

If you can name it you can tame it.

Through that acceptance you start opening another door, which is...

Can we find the courage to change career paths and trust that "re-birth" is always possible?

We do not need to physically die and be re-born again to experience a new life, a new family, a new career path etc. We can choose to start something new or follow our neglected passion in any moment in time. 

This week I had the opportunity to talk to 10th graders at a career forum. My career path has not been a linear one and continues to change. I am humbled by teachers and facilitators that I have trained with and they were still sharing their wisdom at age 98, late 80ies and late 70ies. 

When we are young we try to figure out what we want to do in life, which courses to choose, what university to go to. My generation would have done the "sensible thing" and studied something that is "solid", you know what I mean. Very few would have gone into the arts or drama or similar. 

Today's youth is different. While many don't know what courses or studies to choose and are still...

Over the past weeks I had the opportunities to realise how far I have come on my own healing and "feeling whole" journey. By no means was it an easy ride, on the contrary, but it was well worth it! I am sure more is to (over)come and we never know what lies ahead of us. However, there comes a moment in life when clarity (head) and courage (heart) guide us in co-creative collaboration. 

Where would our world be without determined as well as creative visionaries? Richard Branson left school at age 17 with dyslexia. Steve Jobs quit university and spent a lot of his time in his garage. Maybe you or your children have visions or ideas that others feel are too far fetched? Don't give up on them! The world needs new fresh visions and ideas. 

Here I would like to also remind you of a nice exercise especially with your child: replace the word "stubborn" with "determined", replace "bossy" with "leadership skills", replace "daydreamer" with "creative mind" etc. Google pays...

Today I would like to share with you some of the resources that I use to gain clarity when the mind seems "clouded", the body restless and the path unclear. You can also apply those resources if you have bad sleep patterns, feel anxious and worry a lot, are grieving or just feel the need to gain some clarity in life, business, relationships etc and most of all want to relax. 

Before I list all the resources, you can also scroll down to them, that I use and share with my clients I would like to note some observations.

There is something fascinating about our behaviours. The majority of us are avoiding stillness. Have you ever noticed that? Why do we keep ourselves busy and distracted instead of sitting in stillness or merely observing our thoughts? How many of us allow ourselves to also physically move our emotions and let ourselves be moved by what comes from deep inside? 

Sometimes when I observe people I notice that they are permanently "running" - usually away from...

and sunsets are proof that endings can be beautiful ... 

I have uploaded a video with a reading of Herman Hesse's poem "stages". You can find it on youtube or by  clicking the above button. 

I love these quotes. They are simple yet magical and deep. Imagine to apply them to life every single day. You might say "I don't want endings every day" but as you go to bed the day ends... and as you wake up in the morning another day begins... So you are practicing it every day but maybe you never thought about it consciously. 

Maybe you could consider to end your days with a thought of a few lines of gratitude - acknowledged with awareness or written into your journal. Maybe you could start your mornings being present and giving yourself the time that you need to begin it more aware and mindful. Every morning, in fact every moment, you have the opportunity to create a new and different reality and life for yourself and your loved ones. 

I tend to wake up between...

We can thrive when we feel supported and connected. I have uploaded a  video on my Simply Mpowering channel on youtube

Who is a leader? Anyone who leads by example. So as a parent you are not less of a leader than somebody who has thousands of people reporting to them. You have no idea how you might influence your child's or anyone else's life and who they might become. The same is the case with teachers for example. I do feel that the job and purpose of teachers will change. They no longer hold all the information. That is a click away - for everybody. However, I would not want my children taught by "robots". 

Today I would like to focus a bit more on the topic of support: feeling supported, supporting our children, what do we need ourselves to feel supported etc. 

I would like to invite you to first of all try out this exercise around support: 

1) Put your pen into your hand, close it into a fist and turn...

I am so proud to present you my first podcast. I hope you will enjoy listening to it! 

For those of you who prefer to read, below is also a transcription!

Being a mother of two teenagers I have experienced different phases with them. There is so much to learn with them, about them and from them. Each period of our children's growing up holds its own beauty but also brings various challenges. Some people say: small children small problems, big children big problems. I will leave it up to you to contemplate about that and ask yourself if this is true? Why yes or why not? Maybe you would also like to ask yourself: do I actually know my child's problems? 

Children grow up very fast. When they are babies or even six or seven or ten we don't quite notice it. When they hit 14, 15 or 16 it suddenly seems like you don't even realise how fast time went. A few more years and they are most likely leaving the nest... 

There is one important thing to remember: ultimately we...

As I was cleaning my fridge this afternoon I was listening to relaxing piano music with birds chirping in the background and contemplating: I want to live a mindful life. 

I usually play that piano music piece in the mornings as it is very relaxing and sets us up for the day. The mornings in our household are very calm and I like to create a nurturing, loving and mindful space for my children so their day starts with more presence. Each of us has their own routine and everyone's morning schedule is different, even our dog has his own morning and breakfast routine. Everyone's individuality has space and yet there is a lot of connection present. As a mother I am the gyroscope. If the destination shows "calm" it is calm. If I was to stress and fuss everyone would get stressed. That's why I find it so important that I start my mornings in a centred and present way. It evolved naturally  and simply stayed that way.

My body and mind are now "programmed" to go into a calm and...

Today I would like to share some thoughts titled "As I began to love myself". They are attributed to Charlie Chaplin and it is said that he shared them on his 70th birthday. They hold very profound wisdom and clearly deep experiences collected over a life time. We live in a world where old people are put into homes, rarely visited and where their wisdom is "locked up". There was a time in humanity's history where "elders" were asked for advice as people knew that they held wisdom acquired over a life time. We can be "wise beyond our years" and yet life's experiences add a deeper meaning to that wisdom. 

Have you ever asked yourself if you love yourself? Have you ever asked yourself if there is maybe a part of you that feels "you are not worthy of love" - because that's what somebody used to tell you in life? You are very worthy :) Have you ever feared arguments because you felt "that's my father / my mother and I don't want to be like them" but in the process swallowed a lot...